just do it...

so i run. i'm a runner now. in the words of TayTay, i never ever ever ever (like ever) thought i would ever say that sentence in my entire life. i run and i like it. i run! i.....run. i kinda keep saying it to convince myself that it's actually true. honestly, even 3 months ago if you would've told me that i was going to start running, and actually running long distances (in my opinion) i would've lol'd. so this is kind of a big deal.

for as long as i can remember, since the good ol' days at Jordan Ridge Elementary, when it was P.E. time and we had to run the mile (which was exactly 4 times around the rectangle shaped-field adjacent to the school) i would get sweaty. and not sweaty as in anxious and excited; my palms would be wet from the fear of knowing i couldn't do it, and knowing i hated it, and wishing with all my heart i had stayed home that day. i still remember running in the hot sun and thinking i would rather die then be doing what i was doing. same thing for middle school, and same thing for high school. running the mile was the absolute worst thing ever in my life; actually, anything that had to do with physical exertion made me want to hide and do anything but.

then, almost 4 years ago, i was fat and pregnant. before i got pregnant with Dylan i was already 25lbs heavier then i was when Brett and i knelt over an alter and promised eternity. let me tell you how good it felt to add another 30lbs with pregnancy. awesome i tell ya. no, it was mind-blowingly annoying and frustrating. after i had Dylan, i was still 35lbs above where i was when we got married. and for some reason, i don't know why, but laying around all the time eating fast-food and snowcones and ice cream and candy just wasn't helping me lose weight. my mind was boggled.

so after being sick of looking in the mirror and putting on clothes everyday that were much bigger then i wanted, i decided to join Weight Watchers. that program is the bomb! honestly, i highly recommend it. i never thought i would need a company to help me get to a size that i wanted; or, at least one that i recognized and could feel good with. before i got married, i had always eaten whatever i wanted and didn't bother to do any exercise ever. well actually, i would walk up the to go to my room after school....does that count? so it was honestly a shock for some reason that after i had Dylan 80lbs didn't just instantly drop. oh how niave young Kate used to be. i was never a stick before, but i was comfortable and confident in how i looked, so i never really cared to try and change my diet to look better. so thinking i would actually have to work for it seemed overwhelming. but when you hit a certain point that you just want to make a change, you are willing to do anything to achieve it.

Weight Watchers helped me drop 25lbs. in a few months. i was ecstatic! but, i still had 10lbs to go to get to my starting weight when we were first married. i am sure i could've lost more if i had kept 100% on track with it after that, but i got to a point where everything fit again that hadn't fit in a long while, and it was good enough. and what is so good about that diet program is that it really is a lifestyle change, so i was used to eating well and knowing about how many calories i should be eating to lose or stay where i was. but i wanted something to do during the day, so i decided i was going to get a gym pass to my local rec center and start working out. to this day i still have no idea where that idea came from, let alone my desire to do so, because remember that girl i told you about 3 paragraphs up? yeah, she was still there. but i wanted to and needed too. 3 years ago i stepped into that gym, and i have been going ever since. and what do you know? i lost those 10lbs, and have stayed within a 3lb. range since. but not only did i reach my goal, i love to exercise. it helps me deal with stress and relieves my body of it. i always have such a high after going. it's not always easy, and it's definitely not something i always want to do, but i always remember the feeling when i'm done and that drives me to keep going.

so after 3 years of going to the gym and trying different workouts and things, my best friend Katie, who knows i do this, is a runner. she runs half's, races and is doing the Ragnar this summer (you go girl!!) and we have always talked on and off about me doing a race with her. i've always laughed and given her the same response every time she asks "i hate running!" i would do any and every exercise at the gym but that. you know why? because when i thought of running, my mind would immediately go back to Jordan Ridge and remembering the exhaustion and dread i always felt when i did it. but after telling me she really wanted me to try it, and assuring me that i would just love it, i gave it a good thought for a couple weeks, and then, for some reason, i said i would. and just like that we signed up for a 10k that was a month and a half away. and since i was not a runner and had 6 weeks to train for a 10k, i knew i needed to get started fast. running and doing other exercises are in two different spectrums, and i knew this.

so i started out small. i did 10 minutes on the treadmill. by the time i got the clock said 00:00 i was ready to DIE! no joke. i couldn't believe i had already bought and paid for that race! if i had tried running before i signed up, there's no way i would've, so i guess it's a huge blessing i didn't. so after running 10 minutes, i ran another time a few days later and had a goal of making it to 12 minutes. i did and again, exhausted. but i kept doing that and adding 2 minutes until i got to 20 minutes then decided i would try to get to 30. it took a couple tries but i got there. then, Katie told me about an app called Nike + that tracks your miles and tells you when you hit a mile and....and i could go on and on. just get it, because that app was a lifesaver. my first run with it i ran 2.6 miles. after one time of using it it changed the entire way i looked at running. no longer was i trying to just make it for so many minutes, i was trying to make it for so many miles. crazy!!!! so the next time i ran i wanted to see if i could get to 3 miles, no longer caring about how much time i spent running. well 3 miles came and went, and i didn't feel tired, so i got up to 4.5 and i was shocked! then the next time i ran i wanted to hit 5 miles and i hit 6.5 miles! the craziest thing ever in my life i tell you. when i told my mom i did that she laughed in my face guys, that's how much everyone around me knows i used to hate running. but after doing it so much and hitting and smashing goals i never thought i could, i absolutely LOVE it! now i get on the treadmill and it's like "i will just run a few miles and see how i feel" when before that sounded like climbing Mt. Everest: impossible. now it sounds like a breeze, and i love that. but anyways, so i wanted to run a couple more times before our race and push myself a little more, but i caught Brett's cold and decided rest was better for me then pushing too hard a few days before the big run. i did run 2 miles the day before and felt like it was a breeze so that had to be good enough.

well, the day of the 10k arrived. oh, i should probably tell you that all my running before this race was a on a treadmill. A Treadmill people! thanks to my dumb cold i never got a chance to run on pavement even though i had planned on it knowing it was completely different then the road. and on top of that, the day of the race was 40 degrees and pouring rain. not just a sprinkle. like you need an umbrella type rain. so not only was i not used to running on pavement, but i definitely wasn't used to running in the cold with water spilling on my face the entire time. so i knew it was going to be a very interesting treat. but, being the changed woman i am with all this running loving, was excited and pumped for it. i was ready!

sidenote: i look less then happy in a lot of these pics. remember it was raining and freezing :) i was definitely happy to be here.

so Katie and i and her sister and her sister's friend who were doing it with us all got to the starting line, and the feeling of them counting down to the start was crazy! it was so thrilling, it's hard to explain. i got my music playlist i had made just for that race ready, said a prayer then the announcer said "GO!" and our whole race was off to run, in the rain in which we were all drenched already. Katie and i stayed together for the first mile and a half, then we hit a massive hill that i was not expecting and, since i hadn't ran on pavement, was not used too. so i told her to go ahead and i speed walked up it. we didn't run together the rest of the time, i was by myself for the next 5 miles. i ran the majority of it, but i did stop and speed walk a few times for a couple minutes or so, but then someone would pass me and it's crazy the motivation that gives you to start up again. and what was really great (enter sarcasm) was that it was raining so hard, that water obviously got into my ears and my headphones got soaked and stopped working halfway through. i NEVER run without music. so you can imagine how happy i was about that.

but i kept on keeping on, and one hour and ten minutes later i was crossing that finish line (which Brett and Dylan met me at by the way, how sweet are they to hang out in the cold and the rain? talk about heart-melting. so lucky to have their amazing support) and i have never been so happy to do something in my entire life. Katie and her sister and her friend were all there at the finish line waiting for me too. it was so fun to see them and hear them cheering me on as i got there. we hugged and had a little pow-wow about how amazing it was and how good we all felt we did. I was stoked that i got 1:10, because Katie, the avid runner she is, got 1:01. i was shocked to hear that i was only 9 minutes behind her, and only 4 minutes behind her sister and friend. wow, such a rush! **ps the first pic below you can see Brett behind me holding the orange umbrella.

then once we were done we went inside where they had tables of food to eat (i wasn't hungry or thirsty, i never am when i run. yeah i'm weird) but the girls were. they also gave us our times and our medal necklaces and they had banners you could take pics in front of. we took lot of photos and huddled under emergency blankets since it was freezing and we were 100% soaked. then the shivers came because the adrenaline left and we were frozen so we said our goodbyes and went home. a hot shower never felt so good.

gearing up for this race and doing it has changed my outlook on so many things. i can do hard things. i can run 6.5 miles, and like it! i can run without music and still make a good time. i can run outside and in the rain, and chilled to the bone. i can change my attitude towards something if i give it a chance (in most but probably not all things, but considering i never thought i would change my mind on this i would say i could probably on most anything i set my mind too). i am a runner, and i love it. i did it! i did my first 10k and didn't die! it was amazing. so incredibly challenging, but amazing. maybe the half in September? i'm debating it.

just do it. whatever it is you are thinking (that's a good thing), just do it. Nike says it best. especially if it's a hard thing, because the things that we do that are hard are the most rewarding and satisfying.